Your Toxic Personality and 3 ways to deal
We have all heard the term or at least are familiar with the idea of toxic personalities. You know those people who are abusive, unsupportive, or emotionally unhealthy. We forget or ignore the fact that we do this to ourselves constantly. We can be victims of our own toxic personality when the mind speaks to us. It can be so frustrating. Mark Manson refers to this as the Feedback Loop from Hell. The feedback Loop from Hell looks like this "You get anxious about something, then the anxiety cripples you and you get anxious over being anxious. Then it repeats." So what can we do?
Is this thought true?
First, we can ask ourselves is this thought true? This question can genuinely change your life. Stop for a moment and ask if this thought you’re dealing with true? Can you be absolutely, certain that it’s true? – This simple question gives you the opportunity to open your mind and go deeper into the unknown, to find the clues that live beneath what you think you know.
How do I feel when I think of this?
Second, ask yourself, How do I feel when I think this thought? Asking this question will allow you to notice any internal cause and effects. You can see that when you believe the thought, there is a disturbance that can range from mild discomfort to outright panic and fear. What do you feel?
Lastly, how do you treat the situation you’re thinking about, how do you treat yourself, when you believe that thought? Be as specific as you can. Whom would I be, and what would I do differently, if I were not thinking this thought? Imagine yourself outside of your body, in your situation, without believing the thought. How would your life be different if you couldn't think this stressful thought? How would you feel?
Behind every stressful feeling is an untrue thought. When you recognize that the thought isn’t true, there is no suffering. When you change your thoughts, you change your life. So next time when life gets crazy busy, and you catch a thought that is stressing you out, ask yourself these questions.